dilemma

My friend was home alone watching “documentaries” … the type you normally watch alone, provides relief, and, if you take copious notes and pay close attention, improves your repertoire.

In the middle of a rather climatic scene, he heard a commotion coming from the front of his house. He jumped out of bed and went into the living room where he, very slowly, parted the slats of the living room blinds.

There were about twenty people standing on his yard and sidewalk looking at his house. “What the …” Just then, someone banged on the door and yelled “FIRE!” My friend grabbed pants that were on the couch and dashed outside.

His SUV was engulfed in flames In the driveway.

You only have a split second to react … what would you do?

Option A - Run in the house, grab the dog and your most precious possessions before the fire spreads, or

Option B – Run and get the fire extinguisher from the kitchen or the hose from the back yard to stem the fire.

My friend went with Option C. His priority was most clear. He ran back into the house, right pass the dog and the table with his wallet, straight into the bedroom and turned off the TV and threw various accessories under the bed before someone wandered in the house and saw what he was up to while Rome burned around him.

“We don’t need no water let the mother …”

must ... save ... porn

where have you been ...

... mind you, I have never left the USofA ...
been neglecting Africa and most of Asia ...
I have work to do ...

window ... schmindo ...

i may have missed the window

Recently, I went to the club here in DC whose name might lead you to believe that rowers attend (I’ve yet to meet a rower there, let alone a diver or swimmer). It’s the kind of club where you lock your valuables in a little vault, get handed a little towel, and are directed to a locker, booth or room.

After checking out the sauna, I showered and headed back to my booth. I think I look my best when I am wet, so I was moving with a rather confident stride. Standing outside my cell was a long, tall drink and boy, was I thirsty!

He asked to come in and I looked behind me just in case there was someone else there. There was ... but the comment was still directed at me. He has the current "it" boy pronounced oblique muscles running down into his crotch, but I was a bit more exicted about his serratus muscles (I'll have to post about what excites me in a boy). Anyways, let me make this short and sanitary ... we had a very nice time for about four hours before we both had to return to our respective homes (and in my case, my Honey).

For the past two weeks, we have been exchanging text messages or chatting via cells on a regular basis. Silly things like:

“That was hot.” “I can’t wait to do it again.” “You have a great ASSet.” “Lets get together, real soon.” “I am so hard just thinking about you.” And my favorite, “Did you fuck me?” ... “Yeah, don’t you remember?” (My faithful reader(s), I do hope you realize that I quote in green bold letters)

One of my messages was ... “If we’re gonna do it again, it’s gotta be real soon or we’ll miss the window.” He replied, “Window?”

You know about the window. The time period that’ll elapse once the endorphins evaporate and you’re no longer interested in getting horizontal. Many different things cause this to happen. Too much time may go by in between the time you met and the time you actually get to hook up (or hook up again). You might get to know the person too well and you realize that you don’t like them after all or you might get to know the person too well and you crossover into the friend zone.

As many times as we tried to get together this past week, I am afraid that I may have blown

the window. We went out last night and had a good time drinking and listening to music at JRs, but I was too tired (having put in a 14 hour shift at work) to join him at Nation or anything else that would have followed. He was game, but I like don’t enjoy sex so much after drinking too many beers and when my ass would be dragging. I like being fully in the moment, delivering my A game, and in control.

We tried to met up again today, but he texted over that he was “stuck” and couldn’t make it.

Did you hear that? The sound of a window closing.

Where did I put that prybar?

references

Friday ... I was drinking a warm Corona at JR's while hanging with an acquaintance when someone I know from the gym passed by. He nodded his hello and kept walking out the door. I commented on how cute he was and that he was also a nice guy. My acquaintance was more direct, "Worst lay ever."

Poor guy, that was the third time I heard this particular comment about him. I wouldn't assume that every foray in the sack is spectacular, but to hear the same exact comment from three random guys, makes me thinks he needs to improve his skills (or, at the very least, get some new representation to counter the spin). That's assuming, of course, that he knows he's the "worst lay ever."

I've had my fair share of bad and boring sex but I've never filed any bad press about a particular guy. If it's bad and boring, we aren't going to get together again so Monday morning quarterbacking isn't necessary. Besides, I may have not liked it, but their skills may rock someone else's boat (doubtful).

Saturday ... I was hanging at Fuego at Cada Vez watching the Latin boys having a great time on the dance floor. I bumped into two friends and introduced them to each other. They stepped aside and started a conversation while I stood there like Don Corleone waiting for my friends to come greet me.

In between beer runs and trips to the bathroom and dance floor, the boys took turns asking about each other. I kept it to "He's a nice guy, works for so and so, and I met him at ...," but that wasn't enough. What they really wanted to know was, "Dating status, what's he packing, and top or bottom."

I knew the answers to all their inquiries but decided to keep them to myself since I didn't think they were compatible. My opinion didn't really matter because I thought it was up to them to figure it out. To me, so much fun comes from the initial exploration dance and I didn't want to rob them of that opportunity. I left fairly early and don't think they hooked up, but I was certain they would exchange numbers and become friends. Had I given my "references," they wouldn't have bothered getting to know each other.

Sunday ... as I walked into Lizard Lounge, I noticed a very nice looking, dark, muscular, Latino hottie hanging out by the front bar with friends. I've seen him several times over the past three months and recently, we've begun acknowledging each other's presence (big grins and the obligatory manly nod).

As I walked by him, our eyes caught, so I stopped and finally greeted him verbally and physically (I just shook his hand - get your mind out of the gutter). I kept moving because I don't like interrupting someone involved in a conversation ... that and the fact that my attraction to him made me nervous.

I was hanging with Jesse, a local gay bar bartender, and I asked him if he knew anything about the hottie. "I heard he was good in bed," was his response.

That wasn't the response I was expecting. I thought I was gonna get something about his nationality, his career, or maybe even his drink of choice, but I certainly didn't expect such a personal reference.

Jesse said there were many references readily available since DC is such a small town. I always though our community was fairly large. When I go out, I always meet a local I've never seen before. But I will admit, over these past eleven years, I've accumulated quite a bit of knowledge on my friends, acquaintances, and strangers.

Knowledge is power and I've decided to use my power for good. I will keep their references, especially the bad ones, to myself and hope that, in turn, my personal references are kept confidential (if they aren't I hope they're at least good).

Note to self, next time I see the very nice looking, dark, muscular, Latino hottie, stop, greet, and stay for a while.

busted

Today, Andy was telling us about how three of his friends had their memberships revoked last week for displaying “inappropriate behavior” in the sauna room. Apparently, the manager of the gym was conducting a locker room sweep and walked in on these three boys doing “something” (details were not available.) He requested their membership cards as they exited the gym and, a few days later, they received letters informing them that “their request” to have their memberships cancelled was processed.

Andy felt the letters misrepresented what really happened and indicated that his friends should have received a warning and a second chance. “Why?” I blurted out. While I thought his support of his friends was admirable, I couldn’t understand the logic behind his statement.

I thought the letters helped them save face in what was clearly an awkward situation. A letter misrepresenting the facts was much better than a police report detailing the truth. Someday, when they run for office, they will be grateful a letter detailing their indiscretion won’t fall in Dan Rather’s hands.

As to the warning, even I, with my lousy vision, read the sign posted in between the sauna and steam rooms which clearly stated “inappropriate behavior” could result in membership revocation and possible criminal charges. I guess the big red stop sign on the top of the poster wasn’t attention-grabbing enough for them. Only flashing lights would have made the warning more noticeable.

This just in … It shall not be lawful for any person or persons to make any obscene or indecent exposure of his or her person, or to make any lewd, obscene, or indecent sexual proposal, or to commit any other lewd, obscene, or indecent act in the District of Columbia, under penalty of not more than $300 fine, or imprisonment of not more than 90 days, or both, for each and every such offense. Duh!

And as to a second chance, I don’t think their carelessness and stupidity should be rewarded. Many men fool around back there and never get caught because they are discreet and sensitive to member's morals. By the by, it’s called a lookout; two can play while the third looks out … not at.

In the three years I have worked out at this gym, I have walked in on countless instances and examples of “inappropriate behavior.” I’ve even walked in on employees enjoying themselves (ummm … personal trainers.) Most of the times I walked out but occasionally, I'll admit it, I joined the fold. No angel here. I chose to join in. I chose to ignore the law. I chose to ignore public morals. And I chose to ignore the warning with the big red stop sign. If I get busted I'll have no one to blame but my self (well, maybe the lookout.) The consequences will be accepted like a man. I wonder if that was the "something."